Local gay couple plans Election Day wedding

By CHRIS CAESAR
The Orange County Register

If they weren't two men, John Petersen and Leonard Niedbalski could be one of the most traditional couples on the block.

The pair met at a gym in Los Angeles 22 years ago, when John was "doing the acting thing" in Hollywood and Leonard, based in Costa Mesa, worked for an aerospace company. Soon, the two fell in love, and within a year had moved to a new home in south Orange County.

Since then, John and Leonard have settled in a comfortable home in a gated, family-friendly Aliso Viejo neighborhood. Two scampish dogs playfully roughhouse on their porch – adorned with American flags and political signs – while neighborhood children ride bikes past their two-car garage.

The couple, it seems, is in it for the long haul. So, while many of their friends decided not to get married after Prop. 22 was overturned by the state Supreme Court earlier this year, the couple jumped at the chance to formalize their arrangement.

"It's a statement that we're in a relationship, and that we should have the same rights as any heterosexual couple," Leonard said. "I don't want to get married in anyone's church – I want to be married as a citizen of California and the United States, under the constitution."

Proponents say that Prop. 8 – which seeks to define marriage as a relationship between a man and a woman in the state constitution – will correct an undemocratic reversal of thousands of years of tradition and preserve the sanctity of marriage. Opponents counter that solely defining marriage in heterosexual terms is inherently discriminatory.

Initially, the duo planned a romantic wedding on their Feb. 28 anniversary. But, as support for Prop. 8 started to grow, the couple grew concerned that the initiative's chances could dash their marital aspirations.

"Our first thought was that there was no way this could pass," John said. "Then, we started to get a little nervous."

The couple will instead take their vows in an informal Election Day ceremony with two witnesses, hoping that the pre-emptive marriage – even in the event of the proposition's approval – will still be honored in California or other states recognizing gay marriage.

Whether or not their legal strategy will work is not clear – proponents of the measure say that the bill will invalidate all homosexual marriages in the state, but opponents disagree. California Attorney General Jerry Brown said whatever retroactive effects the bill may have will ultimately be decided through litigation.

"Couples are making their plans to come in before Nov. 4 because people are getting a little uneasy," said San Francisco Clerk-Recorder Karen Hong Lee. "It's too close to call, basically, and it's legal right now, so why wait? Why take the chance and say, 'let's get married on Nov. 5?'"

"We believe very strongly that these marriages will remain valid, but some people believe otherwise," Shannon Miner, legal director of the National Center for Lesbian Rights, said. "I anticipate that anti-gay groups will challenge [these marriages]in court."

For now though, the couple has plans to get married in the late afternoon Tuesday, and spend the evening watching the returns of an election that could ultimately untie their knot.

The couple is holding out for a large celebration on the date of their anniversary, but whether it will be a belated wedding party or a renewal of their vows will be decided Tuesday.

"[Heterosexuals]are allowed to marry, and we just want the same treatment," John said. "We don't want to take away their marriage, just be all-inclusive."

Orange County Register reporter SAM MILLER contributed to this report.
Contact the writer: ccaesar@ocregister.com or 949-454-7309